Wednesday, May 8, 2013

My Deepest Regret....


My biggest regret is how often I have neglected to live in the present moment. Rather than enjoy every single day to it's fullest, I was always thinking about upcoming things. I can't wait until I get to high school became I can't wait until graduation became I can't wait until college became I can't wait to get married....you get the idea....

Too often I have looked forward to something rather than being happy with my current state of, well, being. I keep saying things like I can't wait to go to Europe, I can't wait to get a place of my own, I can't wait to be blah blah blah.... If I died today would they put on my tombstone "she couldn't wait for this"? That's a scary thought. Am I just going to keep fast forwarding my life until that final day of my life comes? I don't want to live like a person rushing to die!

I realize that I have taken many things for granted. So, I'm planning to do something I've never REALLY done before and that's stop looking forward. Yes, I've said this in the past, but I've got to commit to living in the current moment and being 100% content with where I am right now.

I've got a lot of things I want to do, but planning to do them should not be all I think about. This way of thinking has kept me in a deep depression that I hide from the world. I constantly think about the things I haven't done, haven't achieved, haven't received, and it keeps me feeling a sense of lack that makes me so sad.

I should instead be looking at what I HAVE done, what I HAVE achieved, what I HAVE received and be grateful for the abundance of things in my life I overlook and take for granted daily.

I saw this awesome photo on facebook and plan to really commit to this:


No more regrets! I forgive myself for always trying to fast forward my life and am excited to be here today and be here every day from now on. I will keep working towards my goals and dreams but I will not center my life on the future anymore. I will be grateful for all that I have right now and be grateful for all that I receive in each moment for the rest of my days. Tomorrow CAN wait, let's enjoy today while today is still here!


Source for image above.

17 comments:

  1. I'm going to make the rest of my life the best of my life. Nice!!! I just lost a friend this week - only 29 years old - to brain cancer. She really, truly, fully lived her life in the moment - no regrets. We could all learn from her. Thanks for your post.
    www.nourishstratford.com

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    1. So sorry for your loss. I want someone to be able to say "She really, truly, fully lived her life in the moment - no regrets" about me one day. I'm 28 so that really just hit home for me.

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  2. How awesome and congratulations!!! What an amazing opportunity there is right here, right now, and now, and now...and OH my goodness - here's another now!! So exciting to have such an abundance of nows all around...LOL - have fun playing with them gorgeous!

    Live.Love. Lush and Fearless,
    ~Namaste

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    1. Thanks! I do fully intend to have fun playing :)

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  3. I think most of us are guilty of this; trying to fast forward our lives, borrowing trouble from tomorrow (as my grandma used to say). Thanks for your inspiring post.

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    1. Yep, a lot of us are guilty of this, but it's time to stop borrowing trouble from tomorrow ;) Thanks for your comment. I like that saying of your grandma's!

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  4. This almost made me cry, Ashley. Almost, because I recognise myself in your words, but have also consigned that mindset to the past. Here's to living in the NOW! Thanks for sharing. This can't have been easy.

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    1. Yes, here is to living in the NOW! :)

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  5. This is truly a great post because I think most of us have done this at some point in our lives...I know I am guilty of it!! Thank you for this reminder!! This is a post that will make people stop and think!

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  6. Like the thoughts here, Ashley! We always try to look forward so much so that we forget the present moment. Too true! Thanks for sharing!

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  7. Ashley, what a real post! It does make you think! Living in the present isn't an easy task to always do. Staying in the now takes practice. There's nothing wrong with planning, just don't plan the results. Living in the present keeps one focused, keeps them on target of accomplishing short & long-term goals, less stress...and so on. Keep plugging away at :)

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    1. Liz, thanks for your comment :) Yes, it does take practice to live in the present moment. One day at a time!

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  8. I love your raw and genuine honesty. I have an uncanny ability to live in the present. I savor every moment of every day. I'm not sure why I am that way. Maybe I learned early on that plans fall thru? Back in 1995 I watched a friend meticulously plan a pregnancy so her child would be born under a certain astrological sign only to deliver him unexpectedly early under a sign she didn't like! She became severely depressed and completely changed her entire life's course because of it. Maybe I learned that scheduling everything and sticking to a rigorous agenda really sucks? My ex-husband was a stickler for schedules and plans. I'm too spontaneous for that so we were at odds a lot. I guess my experiences in life have shown me time and time again that no matter how we plan and anticipate things, they can go wrong, fall through, or conversely sometimes end up better than expected. I've also taught myself that each moment is a gift. We aren't promised tomorrow. Each day, each encounter, each relationship is to be savored because nothing is permanent. I hope you can really embrace the present like you want to. The present really is a gift.

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    1. I love you too Bobbie! :) I am over being depressed from not living in the moment. My husband is sooooo amazing at appreciating things in the moment and not focusing on what we don't have. He is teaching me so much and I am going to try to do everything I can to appreciate that each day IS a gift and be happy with spontaneity. I will still make plans and goals, but I won't be so strict about those plans and goals that I overlook the beauty of today! Thanks for your comment :)

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  9. At this moment in my life I can totally relate to your post! At this moment there are many factors that can have me living in past and future yet not in the moment. I am finding that by creating a day to day plan allows me to stay connected to the present more. Your post in another powerful reminder to live in the prsent! Thanks for sharing your thoughts. Best Regards, Wendy

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